We just about resisted the urge to stick the whole of the West Brom team in here…..
We just about resisted the urge to stick the whole of the West Brom team in here…..
For most of us, it’s like Christmas has come again when we’re treated to a full batch of midweek Premier League fixtures. In the spirit of things, we play the part of Scrooge here by bringing these plums right back down to earth.
Who had a shocker this week? Who made themselves look more than a little silly? We’ve made our choices based on the ratings dished out by our reporters – but do you agree? Let us know by using the form at the foot of the page.
Goalkeeper: Scott Carson – West Brom
Beam me up Scotty. The Albion keeper must find himself uttering those very words most weeks because, let’s be honest, he’s not got the best of defences in front of him. If that didn’t make his job hard enough, his decision to drop rather than the more conventional practice of catching Ryan Giggs’ free-kick at the feet of Carlos Tevez made things doubly difficult.
Defender: Carl Hoefkens – West Brom
Another Albion defender, same old story. He's a Championship player, plain and simple.
Defender: Fabricio Coloccini – Newcastle
When he’s on song, the Pinocchio nose and the outlandish 80s perm are all part of the charm. When he’s looking like a liability, they make him look like even more of a fool.
Defender: Sol Campbell – Portsmouth
Emile Heskey could have got a double-decker through the gap that opened up for him on Tuesday evening. Somebody's to blame.
Defender: Wayne Bridge – Man City
The best paid full back in the world? That’s akin to giving the directors of RBS or Northern Rock a meaty bonus. Talk about rewarding the mediocre.
Midfielder: Gianni Zuiverloon – West Brom
Let’s just say it was little surprise to see Zuiverloon included in one newspaper’s list of the worst players of 2008. His New Year resolution must have been 'more of the same'.
Midfielder: Lucas Leiva – Liverpool
The rest of the world should be breathing a collective sigh of relief as we speak. Why? Because if Lucas – former Brazil Under-21 captain – is representative of his country’s future, there’s hope for everyone in South Africa next year. He really is a liability. If Robbie Keane was ever in any doubt as to his standing in Rafa Benitez’s mind, he can be no longer following his manager’s suggestion that Lucas’ ability to play as a forward was partly behind the reason to exclude the Irishman from his matchday squad against Everton.
Midfielder: Geovanni – Hull
A few months ago he was a brilliant Brazilian with the world – or maybe just Hull – at his feet. Now, he’s merely representative of a decline that has seen The Tigers being sucked almost inevitably towards the bottom three.
Midfielder: Kevin Kilbane – Hull
Who needs Zinedine Zidane when you’ve got Kevin Kilbane? Phil Brown must have bought into this when deciding on a January swoop for the former Wigan mane may be sacking his translator as we speak.
Striker: Amr Zaki – Wigan
Much of The JJB had donned a fez in homage to their newfound all-Egyptian partnership only to be profoundly disappointed. Mido and Zaki both bundled their way around up front like a pair of clueless brutes.
Striker: Manucho – Hull
No wonder Sir Alex Ferguson didn’t mind letting him out on loan.